First Kiss
by G. P.
A Sonomi and Nadesico Story
All characters are the property of Clamp. This work is in no way
meant to infringe upon their rights.

I.
"He has to be strong. I want to be kissed by someone strong, who can
sweep me up in his arms, and protect me like a Princess from a fairy
tale. And not just strong outside, but inside, too. "

Izumi glanced about the circle, and saw the other girls smiling in
agreement. Except for Nadesico, who was either distracted or deep in
thought; it was impossible to tell which. The rest concurred that
inner and outer strength was a must. The girls at the sleepover had
gathered in a circle on the floor, debating the necessarry qualities
of the boy who would give them their first kiss. After what seemed
hours of debate, Izumi had suggested that each girl state just one
quality, the one they thought most important. If the group agreed,
then there would be five characteristics by the end. This, it was
fervently hoped, would then help reveal to each the boy who would
bless them with their very first kiss. All eyes now fell on Mayu as
she distractedly played with a lock of her long, black hair. 

The girls treasured Mayu as a sweet and beautiful soul. She was
always there to comfort, to support, and to reassure when a friend
was hurt, or sad, or lonely. Her features were somewhat plain, and
she was sometimes teased for it by those did not know her well. But
every girl in the circle would trust her with her heart, or her very
life. She stared at the plush carpet, meditating quietly on the
difficult question. Finally, in soft voice she stated firmly,

"He would have to be honest. How could you ever trust somebody who
wasn't?"
   
The other girls nodded their heads sagely at Mayu's words. There was
no doubt that honesty and strength were essential. They waited now
for Sayaka to speak, but she sat silent, enveloped in a deep, crimson
blush. Izumi gently elbowed her and teased,

"You're not getting kissed yet, Saya-chan. Come on, its your turn."

Sayaka looked up with glistening blue eyes, fighting off the
embarrassment and struggling to speak. Though the first of their
circle to reach the age of 13, she seemed as naive and child-like as
ever. Endearing and exasperating in turn, they loved her dearly for
her gentle heart and naive innocence. Looking at the floor again, she
spoke in a feathery, halting whisper.

"Handsome. I...I know it's silly, but I wouldn't want my first kiss
to be with someone who wasn't beautiful." 

Had anybody else said this, there would have been giggles and
smirks. But not with little Sayaka. Besides, the girl was right, for
all of them prayed for a first kiss with their own ideal of beauty.
All eyes now turned to Sonomi, who looked aside in embarrassment. She
was often impatient with games like this, and the others half-
expected some sarcastic comment on the foolishness of the night's
proceedings. Though obviously uncomfortable, she spoke with
surprisingly earnest passion,

"They would have to be kind. Otherwise, I'd be too afraid." 

The other girls looked on in astonishment, for to them Sonomi was a
tower of strength. She seemed fearless and aloof, untouched by the
worries that haunted other girls in their daily lives at school.
Athletic prowess had earned her the nickname, "Diana", the proud
goddess of the hunt from the Western myths of long ago. That Sonomi
would so treasure kindness touched them deeply. And it was true. A
first kiss was a scary thing, and fragile hearts should only be
offered to those who would treat them gently. Izumi broke the warm
silence as she looked at the girl nestled next to Sonomi. 

"OK, Nadesico chan. It's your turn. Yo-ho!"

Nadesico turned from gazing out the window, smiling as always. She
looked pleasantly baffled, but no more than usual. Gathering her
thoughts, she said,

"Oh. it's my turn?"

The others nodded. For many, the first impression of Nadesico was
that of a perfect airhead. Her absent-mindedness was legend at the
school, and nearly everyone had a favorite story to tell. Everyone,
of course, except her cousin Sonomi, who protected the perpetually
distracted girl with fierce devotion. Nobody, not the nastiest bully
or strictest sensei dared say anything about Nadesico in front of
her. Izumi half-kiddingly held that Nadesico was an angel who had
unwittingly stumbled onto Earth, "She spends all her time trying to
remember why she is here, and how to get back again." Izumi's little
joke rang true, because there was an angelic aura about the strange,
beautiful girl. And they all loved Nadesico inspite of, or perhaps
because of, her odd otherworldliness. She loved everyone she met with
the same effusive sweetness. Invariably all hearts yielded to her
insistent kindness, and the love she poured forth came back tenfold.
So the girls were eager and curious to hear her contribution.
Glancing about the circle of faces, she blinked her large green eyes
in puzzlement. Izumi suppresed a giggle and reminded her that they
were each stating the most important quality of the one with whom
they would share their all-important first kiss. At this, Nadesioco's
face lit up as she spoke in an excited tone,

"Oh, yes, I remember, sorry, sorry. Umm, that person would have to
be special. A first kiss is very special, so it would have to be with
a special person."

The girls looked at one another, and then laughed their agreement.
Nadesico's logic was unassailable. A first kiss happened once in a
lifetime, and was a precious gift as well as a golden moment to
remember forever. It could only happen with someone special. Mayu,
who had written down each quality, read them off her list,

"So, the person has to be strong, honest, handsome, kind, and
special, yes? Everybody agrees?" 

All five heads nodded, so Mayu went on,  "And that means, ummm, we,
ummm..."

Izumi quickly interjected,

"And that means now we have to tell who we want our first kiss to be
with. And since Nadesico chan was last before, this time she should
go first!"

As always, Izumi had maneuvered skillfully. Someone else would have
to go first in revealing such an intimacy. The other girls were
inwardly relieved, but Nadesico seemed utterly unconcerned as she
cheerfully exclaimed,

"Oh, that's easy. I knew the answer before we ever started. I want
my first kiss to be with Sonomi chan."

For once, Izumi was speechless. Sayaka looked puzzled, unsure of
what Nadesico could possibly mean. Mayu  stared down at her hands as
if they were the most interesting things in all the world. Sonomi
blushed a deep crimson and looked away in utter embarrassment. But
Nadesico simply smiled, oblivious to the pillow that sailed past her
head as Izumi laughed out,

"Nadesico chan, you are such a weirdo!"

Instantly Sonomi hurled her own pillow at Izumi, practically
knocking the cackling girl off balance. More pillows flew amid
squeels of laughter until one tore open and filled the room with a
blizzard of downy feathers. That brought Izumi’s parents in, and
resulted in lights out and everyone being tucked away. But it didn’t
end the whispers and the giggling that lasted far into the night.

II. 
Walking home from school, the two girls made a peculiar contrast.
Sonomi strode straight and steady in utter silence as if she were
struggling for words that didn’t exist. Nadesico, on the other hand,
meandered from flower to tree to interesting crack in the concrete
sidewalk, stopping here and hurrying there, engrossed in the luminous
miracles of the everyday world. Sonomi suddenly noticed that she was
quite alone, and turned to see her cousin sprawled in the grass,
smiling at some sort of bug. A yellow and black caterpillar was
threading it’s way through the grass. Nadesico let it crawl on her
finger and laughed softly as it tickled it’s way up her arm. Sonomi
rolled her eyes and stalked back, calling out with feigned impatience,

“Nadesico chan, what on earth are you doing?”

The girl looked up and smiled sweetly. Gently she put the
caterpillar down and then rose swiftly, dusting off her knees and
straightening her  pleated skirt. Sometimes she looked gawky and
clumsy, a danger to herself and others that brought out a protective
spirit in her cousin. But at other times, like now, her movements
were as gracefully ethereal as a prima ballerina. It was only one of
the contradictions that left Sonomi utterly flustered, unable to
think straight, let alone voice her jumbled thoughts. For years she
had been her cousin’s best friend, delighting in her presence as the
two passed dreamily through childhood. Now her feelings were sharper
but sweeter, and so intense that some nights she tossed and turned
until the sun chased the moon away. Sometimes the very sight of
Nadesico set her heart racing wildly, and plunged her into a joyful
embarrassment. She looked at the beautiful, gray-haired girl and
suddenly blurted out the question that had obsessed her since the
night at Izumi’s,

“Nadesico chan, why did you say what you did at the sleepover?”

As soon as she said it, Sonomi felt regret. A hot crimson blush
spread over her neck and shoulders. But Nadesico blinked her lovely
blue eyes and asked in a puzzled voice,

“What did I say?”

Sonomi fought the urge to drop the entire matter, and with a steel
will forced out the words,

“That you wanted your first kiss…to be with me.”

Now poor Nadesico looked completely bewildered. She furrowed her
brow and looked at Sonomi helplessly, as if the question concerned
some arcane formulae of quantum physics. Perhaps repeating the
question would help, so she asked,

“Why did I say it?”

Sonomi nodded her head vigorously. Nadesico smiled and answered in a
matter-of-fact voice,

“Because it’s true.”

Sonomi gaped at her in silent wonder. Nadesico spoke earnestly in
her odd, sing song voice,

“A first kiss should be special. That means it has to be with a
special person. No one is more special to me than Sonomi chan.”

Breathing raggedly, Sonomi abruptly turned away and stared at the
horizon. She felt delighted and frightened by her cousin’s words.
Still looking into the distance, unable to face those shimmering
azure eyes, she whispered,

“Nadsico chan, we’re both girls. We’re cousins.”

“Um-hmm.” Nadesico replied distractedly, as if she were merely
confirming simple facts, which indeed she was. Sonomi realized that
such conventions as girls only kissing boys had simply never occurred
to Nadesico. Sonomi swallowed hard and managed to stammer out,

“But when, where would we….” Her voice trailed off into silence.
Nadesico perked up, and started rummaging through her book bag.
Triumphantly she pulled out an astonishingly kawaii calendar book,
decorated with massive pink ribbons and plush red hearts. The pages
fluttered as she leafed through them. Finally, she announced in a
cheery voice,

“Sunday after next is a full moon, and the sakuras should be in
bloom. How about at the Park, under the cherry trees? Can you come to
my house at 8:00 PM?”

Sonomi could only nod her head yes. Suddenly Nadesico threw her arms
around her and hugged tightly. Then she picked up her book bag and
looked at Sonomi, all smiles. Still stunned, the red-haired girl
turned and started to walk home, but her cousin wandered over to a
hedge, enraptured by the stately progression of snails on the dark,
green leaves.

III. 
Sonomi rummaged through the contents of her closet one more time.
The pink dress was too much. The black skirt with a white silk blouse
was nice, but just so plain. In frustration, she slumped down on the
edge of the bed and thought,  

"I don't know what to wear for this. I don't have any idea. This is
just crazy. Nobody decides they will have their first kiss like this.
It's like being on....on a date or something." Suddenly inspired,
Sonomi exclaimed,

"OK, that's it, I'll just wear what I would on a date!"

But the girl had never been on a date, either, so this proved to be
of little help. She glanced at the clock on her dresser and grimaced.
Being a naturally punctual and organized person, she was rarely late
to anything. To be late for this was just not acceptable. With a
determined look she got up and stood in front of the rack of clothes
and began to think about what would be right.

"It should be mature, but pretty. And it should match the sakura
blossoms." She placed her finger to her lips and squinted at the row
of clothing. Suddenly, her eyes caught the coral dress and she
snatched it from the rack and ran to the mirror, holding it in front
of herself. Perfect! Breathing a sigh of relief, she rushed for the
shower, quickly considering what shoes to wear.

Walking to Nadesico's house, Sonomi struggled to sort out the
complex feelings she had for her cousin. They had been the closest of
friends ever since they were little girls. Normally high-strung,
Sonomi always felt perfect contentment in her presence, a calm,
peaceful sense that everything was all right. She felt safe with the
girl, confident enough to tell her anything without fear. Nadesico
was a gentle, sympathetic listener, and for all her flightiness
offered perceptive and insightful advice. So the red-haired girl
shared all her secrets, save one: her love. She had always loved
Nadesico, and her alone. But lately, that love had changed,
blossoming, from a cute little bud to a lush, sensuous, tropical
flower. All her friends had their crushes, their hidden passions and
desires. Most of it seemed silly to Sonomi, who scoffed at such
school girl melodramatics. But her own love mocked her. It shook her
skeptical heart and whispered, "Oh, so I'm not important, am I?
Something childish, that you'll soon outgrow, neh? We'll see, Sonomi-
chan, we'll see. Before I'm done, I'll set you on fire and break your
heart."

And it was true. Recently love had become a passionate yearning she
could not still, a painfully sweet longing that distracted and
confused her. It was heaven, and it was hell. Sometimes, late at
night she lay in bed and whispered her name, over and over, just to
hear of the sound of it, "Nadesico.....Nadesico.....Nah-deh-shih-co."
She played ridiculous games like "She loves me, she loves me not".
She kept little treasures: notes passed in class, birthday cards, and
a garland of grass and flowers from years ago, now brown and dry but
still a crown fit for a princess because she had made it. In school,
her grades had slipped, worrying her parents. Sonomi couldn't
concentrate; she kept glancing towards the desk by her side, at the
beautiful, silver-haired girl who smiled back so sweetly. Nadesico
was all she thought about, cared for, wanted. In the last year it had
gotten even worse. It was as if her body was no longer hers, but some
alien presence with a will and a mind and desires all its own. Out of
nowhere she would cry for no discernable reason. One minute she was
hot and feverish, the next cold and shivering.   Her body ached with
a helpless longing that terrified her. And now this. Now, she was
walking to see Nadesico, to kiss her.

Unlike most of her friends, Sonomi had never thought much about a
future love life. Yes, she would no doubt marry, and have a family
like everybody else. But for the red-haired girl marriage was of
little interest, and certainly not the topic of ecstatic speculation
that obsessed other girls her age. But now, her feelings confronted
her with the question of just what to do. What if I love her, but she
doesn’t love me? She sensed that Nadesico did love her, but not in
the same way. Nadesico loved everybody and everything. Yet, she had
said Sonomi was special, words that set her spirit soaring even as
she blushed in embarrassment.. And why, if she does not love me like
that, does she want to kiss me? The more Sonomi thought about it, the
more confused she became. She would have to ask the girl. Tonight.
She had to know.  Approaching the house, she breathed deeply and
clutched the pink sweater tightly around her body. She looked at her
watch: 8 PM exactly. Willing herself to knock, she quickly heard a
commotion inside as her cousin sang out,

“I’ve got it!   

The door swung open, and there stood Nadesico. The warm light from
inside the house formed a glowing aura all around her. She was wore a
delicate, ankle length white dress with long sleeves. The collar and
waistline were embroidered with exquisite lacework, and the dress
flared out from the waist with narrow pleats. White petticoats and
slips gave the dress a full, flowing look. Around her slender neck
was a simple white ribbon worn as a choker. Her long,  silver-black
hair was entwinned with white daisies, and cascaded over her
shoulders. Her pale face was framed by the dark, scenetd hair, and
her green eyes shone with gentle passion. Sonomi stood transfixed,
her breath stolen away by the dazzling vision. Nadesico bowed with
mock solemnity and cheerfully sang out,

"Konbanha, Sonomi-chan"

Sonomi felt herself dragged from a dream, and spoke haltingly as she
returned the bow,

"Konbanha, Nadesico-chan. You look...so beautiful."

The girl took both of Sonomi's hands in her own and spoke in her
feathery voice,

"Arigato, Sonomi-chan. You look so lovely, too. Shall we go?"

Coloring crimson at her cousin's touch, Sonomi could only nod hr
head. Suddenly, the pale girl let out a little gasp and whirled
about, muttering half to herself,

"I almost forget! The bentoubako....there it is" Giggling, she
grabbed the enormous lunchbox, her white Hello Kitty sweater, and
dashed out the door. Smiling at her startled cousin she announced, "I
thought we might like a little snack." Turning to the house she
shouted, "I'm going now!" 

Sonomi frowned, "That looks heavy. Let me carry it."

Nadesico shook her head and smiled, holding the bundle tightly. With
that, the two began their walk to the park As usual, Nadesico was
fascinated by all that she could see. She walked erratically,
starting and stopping as one thing after another gained her
attention. The night was comfortably cool, and the stars shone bright
before moonrise. Sonomi moved in a daze, enraptured by the celestial
apparition beside her. Nadesico's dress make swishy sounds as she
walked, following the odd rythms of her perpetually distracted pace.
Finally they approached the park and turned into the entrance. With
the exception of a few couples, the walkway was deserted. Nadesico
led the way, though in her usual circuitous manner. Sonomi followed,
still entranced. Finally the dark-haired girl found a spot she liked
under the sakura trees, and busilly began unpacking the wrapping of
the lunch boxes. It was a beautiful pink and white silk, which she
carefully spread on the grass like a blanket. She knelt on both knees
and smiled as Sonomi sat down accross from her. Nadesico let out a
little sigh, and pointed to the horizon, where a great yellow moon
was slowly rising into the sky. Sonomi loked and nodded, feeling a
rush of emotions as she struggled to speak. But before she could, her
cousin chirrped,

"Are you hungry? I wanted to make cookies, but they got sort of
burned. But I did make some rice balls, and there's pickles, oh, and
some fruit, too. Plums and grapes, I think. And tea, green tea. we
should have that while it's hot." In a flurry she produced the little
delicacies, plates, cups, and thermos. She laid the feast out
prettilly on the silken cloth, a heartfelt offering to her cousin.
Sonomi noticed that the rice balls were poorly shaped, and smiled as
she imagined the billowing smoke of the burning cookies. Like her
other home made presents, it was so typical of Nadesico. She was far
from talented as a cook or a homemaker. But what she made was imbued
with love and enthusiasm, and fortunate were those who received her
tender little gifts. Though not hungry in the least, Sonomi politely
nibbled as her eyes scanned the blossoming cherry trees above her.
Her cousin, crunching on a pickled daikon, looked up and smiled at
the sight of thousands of flowers.

"Aren't they gorgeous, Sonomi-chan? I've always loved the
sakura.flowers. I love how they fall from the branch in full bloom,
never withering or growing old and sad on the trees. You know, if I
have a daughter, that's what I'll name her: Sakura." 

Sonomi smiled back at her cousin, but thought to herself that there
were flowers she liked better. There was something haunting about
cherry trees, about a beauty so ephemeral and fragile. For some
reason this thought bothered her, and she shifted uneasilly as
Nadesico gracefully poured the steaming, hot tea. Sonomi craddled the
little round cup in her hands and felt the warmth of it in the cool
night air. She sipped the pungent green tea, liquid sunshine brewed
just perfectly. She looked at Nadesico, who glanced up at the heavens
with child-like wonder. Sonomi trembled, but from the cold or the
sight of her beautiful cousin all clad in white she did not know. As
the stars persued their stately courses, the two girls talked on into
the night. Nadesico was bright and cheerful as always, wondering if
flowers slept when they closed their petals for the evening, or if
stars talked to one another to keep from being lonely. In a wistful
voice she said,

"Sometimes I talk to the stars, but it's hard to hear them."

Sonomi looked at the girl in wonder, then smiled. Only Nadesico
would ever say such a thing. But if the stars listened to anybody on
earth, it was probably her. Being with her was always such joy, her
very presence magical. But Sonomi felt terribly nervous, remembering
the purpose of this curious picnic in the dark. Finally she could
hold it in no more, and spoke to up in a quivering, earnest voice,

"Nadesico-chan, may I ask you a question?"

The girl smiled and nodded, and Sonomi went on, forcing the words
out in a rush,

"Why do you want to kiss me?"

Unable to face her saying this, she bowed her head and stared at the
little dishes on the billowing silk. Her eyes averted, she didn't see
Nadesico's tender smile as she replied,

"Well, you know it's my first kiss, and that has to be with someone
special. Sonomi-chan is my most special person. But I told you that
already. So, should I tell you why you're special?"

The red-haired girl was silent, so Nadesico continued,

"Well, Sonomi-chan is the strongest person I know. She's never
afraid of anything. I always feel safe with her, and know she would
protect me from anything that would hurt me. 

And Sonomi-chan is honest. Sometimes other people are a puzzle, and
they say things they do not mean, or hide things they do not say. But
I always know Sonomi-chan's heart. I know that whatever she says is
true.

Sonomi-chan is the kindest person I know. She is gentle, and caring,
and my heart feels cherished by her."

"Sonomi-chan is all of these wonderful things, but she is also the
most beautiful person I have ever seen. Sometimes I think about those
green eyes and soft red hair and smooth, pale skin, and hanyaan! I
forget everything I am doing. Seeing her now in the moonlight just
now made me forget everything except how happy I am to be with her."

At this Nadesico paused, and closed her eyes. 

"But I don't need silly games from a sleepover to know why I want my
first kiss to be with Sonomi-chan. I knew it a long time ago, maybe
even when I first saw her. I want to kiss her because I love her more
than anybody."

Looking up, Sonomi saw Nadesico's azure eyes opening again, and the
startled look as she beheld her tears. A rare look of worry clouded
the dark-haired girl's face as she asked,

"Sonomi-chan, are you all right? I'm so sorry, did I make you cry?"

Sonomi peered through teary eyes and smiled radiently, 

"Baka. I'm not sad. I've never been so happy in all my life."

Nadsico smiled again, and reached out, gently brushing away the hot
tears with delicate fingers. Her hand lingered on Sonomi's cheek, and
she gazed into her shimmering emerald eyes. Slowly, as if in a dream,
Nadesico leaned over, her body a delicate white arch bathed in the
moonlight. Sonomi breathed deeply as the girl's pale face came
closer, her eyes half-shut, her hair a cascading flood of liquid
silver. Their lips brushed ever so lightly, and Sonomi felt an
electric thrill streak through her shivering frame. Then their lips
met, gently at first, tenderly exploring, quivering with the soft
sensations that poured out from deep within. Sonomi tasted the
sweetest nectar as Nadesico's tongue playfully parted her yielding,
pink petals. The red-haired girl trembled, dizzy and breathless,
wracked by an indescribable ecstasy. They melted into one another in
a ravishing embrace, shuddering sweetly in each other's tender arms.
Suspended in an eternal moment, waves of passion swept over them like
an ocean storm, then slowly subsided as the ebbing tide. Finally they
parted, Sonomi breathing raggedly, her body still afire, shivering in
the chilly breeze that shook the trees and rained blossoms down upon
them in a delicate, pink monsoon. 

Sonomi felt floaty and wonderful, her body as delightfully
weightless as a feather in the wind. Her first kiss! She felt a giddy
whirl of emotions, the vibrant throbbing of her heart, and the dewy,
lingering presence of Nadesico's lips. She hugged herself tightly,
and sighed in sheer joy. She glanced up, and was startled to see
Nadesico sitting beside her. The dark-haired girl smiled
enigmatically as she ran her fingers through Sonomi's short silky,
hair. Sonomi's eyes grew wide as her cousin delicately traced the
outline of her still wet lips, then gently caressed her tear-stained
cheek. She caught the scent of sakuras as Nadesico leaned closer, her
lashes fluttering. Their lips met in a another rapturous kiss that
plunged Sonomi into sugar-sweet darkness. As moonlight trickled
through the branches, illumining  the two lovers in an intimate glow,
Sonomi dimly realized that Nadesico wanted more with her cousin than
just a first kiss. Here under the cherry blossoms was a second kiss,
quickly followed by a third, and a fourth. And here, under the 
delicate flowers, and in countless other places as well, there would
be many, many more. 
    


  








Izumi
Sayaka
Mayu